Friday, May 15, 2009

What hurts the most

I found this image on PostSecret. For those of you that don't know about it, this guy has people send in their secrets on a postcard and he publishes them. Some are just little secrets and some are HUGE secrets that are shocking. Everyone has secrets.

So this was sent in by Anonymous and when I read it, it hurt me a lot and I really don't know what. Possibly because I hate the fact that I can relate to it because I lost my baby.... and we did take pictures of her during her funeral. And this person doesn't understand what their friend or whoever is going through... What I'm trying to get at is if you don't understand what I'm going through, at least keep an open mind and know that Emily was still our baby. We took pictures of her because she is our baby and regardless of whether or not she was dead, those are the only pictures that we will ever have of her. We won't have pictures of her first smile, the first time she crawls or is able to sit on her own, or walks. We won't have that. The only pictures we have of her are lifeless. Her little body was lifeless. I won't have pictures that make me smile because she's smiling in it.

I only have pictures of her... with her eyes closed... her cold skin, no smiles... And that's what hurts the most.